For the past few weeks, I’ve shared with you about my stay here in Manila and how I’m spending every minute of it studying and trying to fulfill my real objective of staying here: to study and gain the required Spanish fluency to study and work in Spain.
Because I only stay with a friend who also works in Makati, I have to face the burden of trying to figure out what to cook, how to do the laundry, or, generally speaking, how to organize my life on a daily basis!
I thought that eating out will do, but soon I realized that a daily supply of carinderia food in Manila could effectively send me to a nearby mental institution if it would last long for another more days. So I stopped and started cooking my own food.
I thought I was the best and knows everything when I left my mom’s house. Soon I realized that cooking is also a skill! How come I didn’t realize that early on? I mean, come on. I never thought that it was that hard?
I remember myself complaining to mom one day about how she keeps on cooking the same old food I’ve been eating since god knows when. She just told me to buy her a cookbook. I stormed Fully Booked the other day and gave her the most expensive cookbook. After a few days, nothing changed. I asked mom why, she replied, “Eke rugu aintinjan, tung. English ya eh.” (I can’t understand what’s written in there. It’s English). I almost hugged my mom…
When you’re alone, suddenly, you’ll regret just how you have ignored those little things that could have helped you in cases like this. I had had a lot of opportunity to learn cooking but neither did I pay attention nor I asked mom how to do it when she is asked literally by everybody how to cook this and that because she knows well how to. She might not be the best chef who can cook and prepare the most sumptuous and dignified-looking meal, but she cooks “native” and she does it well…
When I walk down the road going to my school and see all these unfortunate kids in the street and parents who seems to have lost their faith in humanity and just let the day pass without doing something extraordinary to change their fate, I almost always want to fly, see my parent, hug them, and kiss their hands and tell them just how fortunate I am for having parents who have given me such inspiration to fight for life and allow God to use me to be of help to others and be a symbol of faith and strength for mankind (lol). Well, kidding aside, when you stand in your feet and resolved to become strong, you’re doing your loved ones and the humanity a favor – saving a good bank of genes.
I don’t have a lovely family…I never had…And I think I won’t ever have one. But after keeping a little distance from them, I’ve realized just how valuable they are to me. I always hated them for not behaving the way I expect them to and never achieved things I thought would be an ideal situation for me. But these imperfections of them have become my daily addiction. They’re so hard to let go! Shet!
I’ve started to forgive my family…My journey have opened my eyes to some important realities of life. Realities which I would never have learned had I not left home and started living alone to pursue my dreams.
I guess learning is a continuous process. Let it continue. I hope that I’m leaving you a nice reflection before the week ends.
The Brown Mestizo 